HMRC's Trivial Pursuit: Chasing 300,000 Taxpayers for Pocket Change While the Helplines Stay Silent

Morning, you hardworking mugs still waiting for that refund or trying to get through to an adviser without losing the plot. While HMRC's own staff rack up half a million sick days and Fujitsu finally gets the boot, the taxman has found time to bombard over 300,000 ordinary workers and pensioners with what can only be described as "trivial" tax demands – tiny little bills for peanuts that probably cost more to send than they're worth.

Fresh FOI figures for the 2023-24 tax year reveal a record 1.32 million simple assessments – double the average of the previous six years. Of those, a whopping 317,000 were for £100 or less, and nearly half (647,000, or 49%) demanded £300 or less. That's right: HMRC is spending your money printing, posting, and chasing brown envelopes for amounts that wouldn't cover a decent night out or a tank of petrol these days.

These "simple" assessments are meant to spare people the horror of full self-assessment – fair enough if it's straightforward. But when you're hitting pensioners who've never considered themselves "taxpayers" before, just because a frozen personal allowance (£12,570, stuck since 2021 and now extended to 2031) plus a rising state pension tips them over by a few quid? That's not simplification; that's bureaucratic bullying.

The rise is pure fiscal drag – thresholds frozen while everything else creeps up – pulling more folk into the net by stealth. Experts like Ian Futcher from Quilter call it exactly that: a steady creep that's now forcing HMRC to administer "nothing more than £100" while piling shock and hassle on recipients who thought their tax was sorted.

And the cherry on top? Former pensions minister Steve Webb (now at LCP) points out that in some cases, the cost of collecting these trivial sums probably exceeds what they raise. Yet HMRC's boss has defended using debt collectors for as little as £89. Brilliant priorities: hound grannies for a tenner while the phone lines stay jammed and refunds take years.

Rachel Reeves promised in her Budget that from April 2027, pure state pensioners won't get chased for "small amounts" via simple assessments. How generous – after years of this nonsense. Meanwhile, savers, workers with a bit of interest, or anyone else caught in the drag keep getting the brown envelope treatment. And good luck querying it when the hold music is longer than a tax year.

This is peak HMRC: obsessed with squeezing every last penny from the little people, no matter how inefficient, while the big systemic cock-ups (Horizon anyone?) drag on forever.

Tax does have to be taxing.

But wasting resources on trivia while ignoring real incompetence? That's just taking the mickey.

Amazon "Brown Envelope Survival Kit" Suggestions

• Envelope Opener – because some letters deserve dramatic flair
• "Trivial Pursuit" Board Game – ironic entertainment for when you're waiting on hold
• Stress Ball Set – squeeze one every time another £50 bill lands
• "I Owe HMRC £47.82" Mug – fill with something medicinal
• Shredder – for the ones you know are wrong (after checking, obviously)

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