Fujitsu Finally Gets the Boot: HMRC Dumps Scandal-Hit Giant for Netcompany on Trading Service

Morning, you tax-weary warriors. After what feels like an eternity of watching HMRC throw good money after bad into the black hole that is Fujitsu, the penny has finally dropped. Or rather, the contract has been ripped up.

The troubled Japanese IT behemoth – the very same outfit whose Horizon system wrongfully convicted hundreds of sub-postmasters and turned their lives into living nightmares – has been unceremoniously replaced by Danish firm Netcompany on HMRC’s vital Trading Service platform. That’s right: the system that handles the bulk of our import/export declarations, VAT on goods moving in and out, and a chunk of the customs revenue that keeps the lights on in Whitehall.

Fujitsu’s contract? Terminated. Netcompany steps in from 2026, with the transition already under way. HMRC says it’s part of a “strategic shift” to modernise and “reduce reliance on single suppliers”. Translation: “We’ve finally realised that sticking with a company whose software ruined thousands of innocent lives might not be the best look, especially when the Public Accounts Committee keeps asking awkward questions.”

Let’s be brutally honest: Fujitsu should have been shown the door years ago. The Horizon scandal alone – where faulty software led to prosecutions, bankruptcies, suicides, and a £1.3 billion compensation bill (so far) – should have been enough to blacklist them from any government contract. But no. HMRC kept the cheques rolling, pouring hundreds of millions into Fujitsu’s pockets while the rest of us dealt with glitchy online services and endless helpline holds.

This isn’t just a technical switch; it’s a long-overdue admission that outsourcing critical tax and customs systems to a firm with that track record was, frankly, insane. And the timing? Delicious. With the Post Office Horizon Inquiry still exposing fresh horrors almost weekly, HMRC quietly slipping Fujitsu out the back door is about as subtle as a bailiff at dawn.

Netcompany, for what it’s worth, comes with a cleaner slate and a reputation for delivering digital services on time and on budget (in Denmark, at least). Whether they can untangle the spaghetti of HMRC’s legacy systems remains to be seen, but at least they’re not carrying the baggage of wrongful convictions and cover-ups.

So, farewell Fujitsu – don’t let the door hit you on the way out. And good riddance to one of the most expensive, scandal-ridden outsourcing relationships in British public sector history.

Tax does have to be taxing.
But paying a fortune to a company that helped destroy lives? That’s just taking the piss.

Amazon “Celebrate the Fujitsu Exit” Suggestions
(affiliate links – because every small victory deserves a treat)

• Champagne Flutes – for toasting the end of an era
• Confetti Cannon – because this deserves fireworks
• “Good Riddance” Mug – fill with something stronger than tea
• Stress Ball shaped like a computer – squeeze it every time you remember Fujitsu
• “I Survived HMRC Outsourcing” T-shirt – limited edition, obviously

 

HMRC Is Shite (www.hmrcisshite.com), also available via the domain www.hmrconline.com, is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

HMRC's Sick Note Bonanza: Over Half a Million Days Off While You Wait an Hour on Hold

Hello you poor sods still trying to get through to HMRC without developing a stress-related condition of your own. Just when you thought the helpline hell, refund delays, and phantom penalty notices couldn't get any worse, along comes the latest Civil Service sickness absence data dump – quietly released on 16 December 2025, right before everyone buggers off for Christmas.

And guess what? The taxman’s own troops are leading the charge in the great British sickie stakes.

Fresh FOI figures show HMRC staff racked up a staggering 551,064 sick days between August 2024 and July 2025. That's over half a million working days lost – equivalent to every single one of their 66,000-odd employees taking more than eight days off sick each. Down slightly from the year before, mind, but still a whopping great hole in the workforce that's meant to be collecting your taxes and answering your calls.

While you're sitting on hold listening to that godawful panpipe version of Greensleeves for the umpteenth time, wondering why nobody picks up, spare a thought for the absent armies at HMRC. Phones ringing off the hook in empty offices, queries piling up like unpaid VAT returns, refunds taking two years because there's nobody there to process them. Coincidence? Pull the other one.

This isn't just a bad cold going round – it's a chronic case of "can't be arsed" compounded by generous paid sick leave policies that make the private sector look like Victorian workhouses. Nearly half of long-term absences across the Civil Service are now down to mental health – fair enough in many cases, but when it translates to deserted desks and degraded service for the rest of us, something stinks worse than an overdue self-assessment.

And remember, these are the same people who'll hammer you with penalties for filing a day late, while they swan off on full pay for weeks on end. You try telling HMRC you've got "stress" from dealing with their shambles – see how much sympathy that gets you.

No wonder customer service is in the toilet. No wonder small businesses get chased for imaginary billions. No wonder the backlog is biblical. When the workforce treats sick leave like extra holiday, the taxpayers foot the bill – in longer waits, higher errors, and more incompetence all round.

Tax does have to be taxing.
But thanks to HMRC's absentee champions, it's become a full-time job just trying to speak to someone who isn't "off sick" today.

Amazon "Coping With HMRC Helpline Hell" Suggestions
(affiliate links – because you'll need these while waiting for an adviser who might actually turn up)

• Premium Noise-Cancelling Headphones – drown out the hold music before you lose the will to live
• Stress Ball Set – squeeze HMRC's face (imaginary, of course)
• Giant Hourglass Timer – time your next one-hour wait accurately
• "Do Not Disturb – Dealing With HMRC" Door Sign – for when you're finally on the call
• Strong Coffee. Very strong.

 

HMRC Is Shite (www.hmrcisshite.com), also available via the domain www.hmrconline.com, is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

HMRC's Christmas Gift to Taxpayers: Endless Hold Music, Phantom Debts, and a £2.8 Billion Demand for the Local Chippy

Good evening, you beleaguered bunch. It's mid-December 2025, the fairy lights are up, the mince pies are out, and what's HMRC's seasonal offering? A fresh helping of utter shambles, served piping hot with a side of incompetence.

While the rest of us are trying to wrap presents and dodge office parties, taxpayers are still routinely clocking up an hour or more on hold just to speak to an adviser. That's right – in this age of AI chatbots and instant everything, our beloved Revenue can't manage to answer the bloody phone without turning it into an endurance test. Premium-rate hold music raking in the streams while you weep quietly into your spreadsheet.

Accountants? They're being quietly told not to chase outstanding queries because, let's face it, HMRC's backlog is longer than the queue for the January sales. "Don't poke the bear," seems to be the unofficial line, as if bombarding them with follow-ups might cause the whole creaking edifice to collapse.

Then there's the refunds. Overpaid your income tax? Congratulations – you might wait up to two years for HMRC to grudgingly hand it back. Interest-free loan to the Treasury, courtesy of you, the mug punter. They've got your money sitting pretty while you're scraping the barrel. Marvellous.

But the real cherry on this festering cake? Taxpayers being hounded for non-existent bills and penalties. Wrong tax codes, system glitches, pure fantasy debts – HMRC doesn't care. They'll slap on penalties, send in the debt collectors, and let you fight to prove you're innocent. And the pièce de résistance: one small business recently received a tax demand for £2.8 billion. Yes, billion with a B. Presumably for that corner shop that's been secretly running an offshore empire from behind the counter.

This isn't teething troubles. This is systemic rot. Years of underfunding, botched digital "transformations", and a deliberate push to make phoning them so painful you'll give up and go online – where half the services don't work anyway. The Public Accounts Committee called it out: degraded service to force digital uptake. HMRC denies it, of course, while quietly cutting off callers after 70 minutes like some sadistic game show.

How much longer are we going to tolerate this national embarrassment? The same outfit that demands perfection from us – first time, every time, or else penalties – can't answer a phone, process a refund, or issue a correct bill.

Tax does have to be taxing.

But under this lot at HMRC, it's become a full-blown torture chamber.

Amazon "Survival Kit for the HMRC Apocalypse" Suggestions
(affiliate links – because you'll need retail therapy after your next brown envelope)

• Noise-Cancelling Headphones – block out that endless Vivaldi loop
• Blood Pressure Monitor – essential monitoring during your hourly hold marathon
• Industrial Shredder – for when the phantom penalty notices pile up
• "Keep Calm and Appeal Everything" mug – fill with something strong
• Therapy Voucher – because dealing with HMRC is a recognised trauma

 

HMRC Is Shite (www.hmrcisshite.com), also available via the domain www.hmrconline.com, is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

Buried Budget PAYE Bombshell: HMRC’s Latest Sneaky Plan to Nick Your Wages Before You’ve Even Seen Them

Morning, comrades in tax misery. While the nation was busy choking on Rachel Reeves’ National Insurance “not-a-tax-rise-for-working-people” whopper, the Treasury quietly slipped a rusty stiletto between the ribs of every self-assessment taxpayer who also dares to have a proper job.

Tucked away on page 87 of the Budget small-print (you know, the bit normal humans never read because we’re too busy trying to work out why our energy bills now cost more than a small mortgage) was this little gem appeared:

From April 2027, if you’re in self-assessment and you have PAYE income, HMRC intends to hoover part of your self-assessment tax bill straight out of your wages via an adjusted tax code. No more waiting for your January 31st heart attack. They’ll just help themselves every month like a greedy lodger raiding your fridge.

They’re spinning it as “smoothing your tax payments” and “removing the shock of a big bill”. Translation: “We don’t trust you plebs to put money aside, so we’ll grab it before you can spend it on food, rent or other frivolous nonsense.”

The Real Ramifications (Because HMRC Sure As Hell Won’t Tell You)

• You lose control of your own cashflow – That £5k you were going to use as a deposit on a van for the business? Tough. HMRC has already spent it on diversity consultants and a new helpline that still doesn’t answer.
• One-size-fits-all cock-up incoming – They’ll base the adjustment on last year’s SA figures. Get a big one-off contract this year? Congratulations, next year they’ll assume you’re earning that again and ramp your tax code accordingly. Suddenly you’re £800 a month worse off while waiting for HMRC to process a refund 18 months later.
• Self-employed on variable income get absolutely shafted – Builders, freelancers, locums, anyone with lumpy earnings. Your tax code will be wrong 11 months out of 12, and good luck getting it corrected when the helpline is busier than a Wetherspoons on Student Night.
• More power to the most incompetent organisation in Britain – This is the same HMRC that still can’t work out Child Benefit charges properly after a decade. Now they want real-time control over your wages. Sleep tight.
• Interest-free loan to the Treasury – They take the money early, sit on it for months, then (maybe) give some back if you overpay. You get precisely zero percent interest. Lovely.

And the best bit? If your employer cocks up the adjusted code (very likely, because HMRC’s instructions are usually written in ancient Klingon), you get the underpayment penalty, not HMRC. Standard.

Reeves and her minions know exactly what they’re doing: turning PAYE into a stealth tax-rise for the 4 million people stuck in self-assessment while pretending they’ve “protected working people”. Absolute brass-necked genius.

Tax does have to be taxing.
But this government, and the shambolic empire at HMRC, are making it downright bloody criminal.

Amazon “Console Yourself” Shopping List After This Latest Kick in the Codpiece

(affiliate links – because you’ll need something to show for the wages they’re about to confiscate)

• Rage-Relief Punchbag – stick a photo of Rachel Reeves on it
• “Tax Is Theft” mug – for drinking something strong while you fill in next year’s return
• Shredder – 1500W, because burning HMRC letters is apparently frowned upon
• Noise-cancelling headphones – essential for when the hold music finally drives you to homicide
• Whisky. Lots of whisky.

 

HMRC Is Shite (www.hmrcisshite.com), also available via the domain www.hmrconline.com, is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

HMRC Gets the Chop: Hairdresser Slices Through VAT Assessment Shocker

Hello, you long-suffering taxpayers. Premium rate music still on endless loop while you wait for someone in Newcastle to tell you they can’t find your file? Spare a thought for one plucky hairdresser who’s just given HMRC the shortest-back-and-sides of its miserable life.

In a decision that should be framed above every salon mirror in the land, the First-tier Tribunal has booted HMRC’s £40k-plus VAT assessment straight into the bin. Why? Because our beloved Revenue, in its infinite wisdom, had already issued a binding closure notice on an income tax enquiry… then turned round and tried to raise a revised VAT assessment on the very same turnover figures. You couldn’t make it up. Actually, they did.

The law is crystal clear (even when HMRC pretends it’s written in ancient Sumerian): once you issue a closure notice bringing an income tax enquiry to an end, you can’t then reopen the same turnover numbers for VAT unless you jump through very specific hoops. Hoops that, surprise surprise, HMRC forgot even existed. The Tribunal basically told them: “You closed it, you own it, now sod off.”

Result? VAT assessment cancelled in full. Interest and penalties wiped. Hairdresser walks away looking sharper than a fresh fade.

This isn’t just a win for one scissor-wielding hero; it’s a massive middle finger to HMRC’s favourite game: “Let’s assess everything twice and argue about it for five years.” When will these clowns learn that “closure” actually means closed?

Tax does have to be taxing.
Unfortunately, HMRC seem determined to make it downright bloody impossible.

Amazon “Treat Yourself After Beating The Taxman” Suggestions

• Wahl Cordless Super Taper – because nothing says “I just rinsed HMRC” like a proper sharp clipper
• Andis Master Clipper – the Rolls-Royce of fade machines
• BarberCape Professional Waterproof Cape – keep the clippings off while you count your refunded VAT
• The Salon Business Bible – because now you’ve got spare cash to grow the empire
• “F*ck You Money” jar – start filling it with the money HMRC just tried to nick

HMRC Is Shite (www.hmrcisshite.com), also available via the domain www.hmrconline.com, is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"

HMRC To Bin Letters

 

In a bid to slash print and postage costs by £50m and drag HMRC communications into the 21st century, letters will no longer be sent out automatically to taxpayers from next spring. Email alerts will be sent to them, notifying them of new documents in their personal tax accounts or the HMRC app instead. 

As part of HMRC’s ambitious digital by default programme, which envisages 90% of HMRC interactions with taxpayers being online or digital only by 2029-30 tax year, the Budget papers confirmed a major shift to digital by default had been signed off by the government, which is starting sooner than expected.

This means that the days of posted brown letters from HMRC are very much numbered with only the ‘digitally excluded’ or those who actively opt out of digital still able to receive old school posted letters, starting in spring 2026.

In one sense this might be an improvement, given that snail mail comms with HMRC seems to take a year or so. However, those who are not digitally savvy may well face problems with this new high tech vision of HMRC's. 

In June I warned of the bureaucratic nightmare that HMRC's rush to digital will unleash. 

HMRC’s MTD is a self-inflicted wound on the UK’s entrepreneurial spirit, and taxpayers are the ones left bleeding.

Various guides to Making Tax Digital can be found here. 

HMRC Is Shite (www.hmrcisshite.com), also available via the domain www.hmrconline.com, is brought to you by www.kenfrost.com "The Living Brand"