HMRC Is Shite

HMRC Is Shite
Dedicated to the taxpayers of Britain, and the employees of Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs (HMRC), who have to endure the monumental shambles that is HMRC.

Tuesday, 30 August 2016

The Joy of Whiteboards


My thanks to the loyal reader who recently shared his/her views on HMRC's whiteboard fetish:
"Ah, the indomitable whiteboards, remember them well, created hazards to staff in inverse proportion to any gains from having the damn things;

trip hazard - to such an extent that the protruding feet had to be covered with high viz hazard marking yellow/black tape, didn't cure the problem, made it your fault for not observing a clearly marked hazard!

injury by collapse of heavy object - these things were like a mini engineering project to put together, if incorrectly assembled including not torquing the nuts correctly, these heavy items could collapse when being touched (like writing on them) let alone when being moved e.g. because they were blocking or obstructing fire exits, solutions, supposedly only authorised staff to complete the 'meccano kit' having first read and signed, in blood, the instructions, as for obstructing fire exits, well, if there's a fire move the bloody thing, just pray it doesn't disable the fleeing staff in the process!

blocking/obstructing fire exits - they really know how to undertake risk assessments in HMRC, not!

writing on whiteboards in ink colours difficult to read - self applied cure, don't bother reading them...

then there was the 4-sided demon on castors that was rolled around with graphs and sound bites plastered all over it - this abomination had cost £1800 and was a laughing stock amongst staff.

Still, makes you wonder?

Management, my arse, they do make Kermit & Co. look efficient though
."
Halcyon days by the sound of it!

Tax does have to be taxing.

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20 comments:

  1. Whiteboards! Shiteboards more like!

    Record your "statistics" via your p.c. on a system your line management 'should' be capable of interpreting and collating e.g. basic spreadsheets.

    Then nominate a clerical for the day to walk around and collate these figures and write them collectively, on the whiteboard (preferably using a colour of ink that stands out on the whiteboard.(Avoiding all the previously mentioned hazards in the process). Not forgetting to ask the staff who sit so close to the whiteboard to move out of the way for the duration...

    Discuss, ad nauseum, at your daily/hourly meetings.

    You really could not make this crap up!

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  2. The worst part? Celebrations! A brainwashed automaton of a simple minded junior manager standing up , insisting that everyone must record a "celebration" otherwise it would be construed by higher management that the team was not "engaged".

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    Replies
    1. Say someone wants to record a vague 'achievement' such as they had a 'customer centric approach to a case which maximised effectiveness', if you dare not to enthusiastically join with the 'celebration' the HMRC management will say you are displaying negative behaviours and, ignoring your all round hard graft and REAL results will put you on 'improvement needed' to drive you out. The same management turn a blind eye, and join in, with the bullying of those whose face does not fit. HMRC should be placed front and centre of any Government reviews into the cultures and practice within the Civil Service.

      Delete
    2. So, what would generate such a review?
      Certainly not the staff nor the unions, not the PAC or the NAO nor the M.P.'s (unless the P.M. decrees), nor the media.
      Perhaps it will be some of the managers with a conscience who have left in disgust?

      Delete
    3. HMRC has such poor governance that the issues could only ever be attended to by a robust independent investigation by an outside body instructed by a minister. Because HMRC is a non-ministerial department, what then happens is that their misconduct, such as the bullying of staff, goes under the radar and those at a senior level in hmrc avoid any accountability.

      Delete
    4. IF, and it's a bloody big IF, the IPCC could be persuaded to investigate, I believe the independance of the IPCC Commissioners might just ensure a fair outcome?
      I say this because their referral criteria were changed in 2013 on the instructions of the then Home Secretary, now our P.M.

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    5. It seems as if all those who should have sought investigation have simply ignored the obvious.
      Management in HMRC have been arrogantly ignoring their own departments instructions, the Civil Service Code, common decency and ethics as well as breaking a range of laws (H&S, Equality Act etc.).
      IPCC covers HMRC and may well be the most effective means of ensuring a robust and independant investigation.
      Ignoring the elephant is one thing, totally failing to acknowledge a thundering herd is bad news indeed.

      Delete
  3. depressing place to work. Glad I got out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Depressing is an understatement...but I am sure anyone who has had the misfortune of working at the place knows exactly what you mean...

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  4. I love the management drivel theyou write on there. In the past three weeks I have seen the terms 'helicoptering', 'big tent approach', 'cresting the wave', 'think piece' and 'customer centric' used. It is really unfair because if I were to use the term credulous little dickhead to describe the absolute helmet writing these I'd be sacked.

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    Replies
    1. Looks like yet another matrix for more bullshite bingo to me. Common Purpose is a good place to pick one of these up, if that don't work try one of the pages of Lean/Paceshitter if they are still available on the intranet??
      As for the credulous little dickhead/absolute helmet, obviously having this person on their team as a 'manager' is depriving some village of its idiot, return at once!

      Delete
    2. The managers who talk in this way all seem to be the no-hopers who know nothing about the real work and have no management or leadership skills. Instead they got on by creeping around senior management, bullying staff and trying to impress their superiors by talking the type of nonsense language described above (which seems to make them all feel very important). Anyone who has had the misfortune of wasting their time working at HMRC will recognise this type of bad apple manager.

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    3. The only way I've found to counteract this management speak is repeat it back to them parrot fashion ad nauseam! my latest favourite is "horizon scanning"

      Delete
  5. Click the link. Second page. Microsoft. So this is the equivalent large private sector employer HMRC modelled themselves on?
    http://realbusiness.co.uk/article/30337-the-five-best-and-worst-companies-to-work-for/page:2

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  6. HMRC are nothing like a large business sadly... if they were in the private sector they would have gone bust many years ago. Their sole purpose seems to be to provide careers with gongs for the senior 'civil servants' and to bully the hard grafters on the frontline to make themselves feel important and powerful - disgraceful people.

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    Replies
    1. The only way they'll ever get credibility back is to cull a lot of the SCS self-appreciation society. Unfortunately this will never happen. I wonder how many of them ever look in a mirror and reflect on what they are doing?

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    2. Interesting comment... given most of the comments above relate to private sector ideas imported into HMRC at great expense in consultancy fees!

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  7. I'm afraid its the people who want promotion in there at any cost that you need to worry about and these are your lower management grades and those aspiring to be them. They are the ones managing and directly impacting on the staff on a day to day basis.

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    Replies
    1. The junior management 'shop floor' level is where most of the bullying goes on, sadly though they are encouraged to behave like this by a vast HR empire and senior management who go out of their way to cover it all up. Interesting to see the shadow chancellor's excellent plan to change hmrc's governance structure to bring SCRUTINY on them - something for the Government to consider.

      Delete
  8. Its run akin to the SWDP of 1930s Germany on so many levels I'm afraid but as then there are many decent people fighting to change the way it's run on the inside.

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