HMRC Is Shite

HMRC Is Shite
Dedicated to the taxpayers of Britain, and the employees of Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs (HMRC), who have to endure the monumental shambles that is HMRC.

Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Hotseat II


Folks, re yesterday's article, I had a few technical problems at this end. They have now been resolved and I have now uploaded the "hotseat" Q&A re staff survey results and office closures.

Tax does have to be taxing.

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  1. So the answer is "Yes" then.

  2. That's one way of moving up from 103rd

  3. I never imagined that anything the league of muppets did could shock me anymore but the casual arrogance in that reply is a true shocker. It's only a pity we can't award minus figures in the next survey as HMRC would struggle to come 104th!!

  4. It's time to play the music
    It's time to light the lights
    It's time to meet the Muppets on the HMRC Muppet Show tonight.

  5. Ken, I am sure that there are some people in Private Eye and on the Treasury Select Committee who need to know. And would be happy to give Lamey some feedback.

    The staff survey is meant to be about us marking senior bods. Instead, the senior bods are using it mark us. Get with the programme or get out - HMRC's motto.

    Those organising the survey should be asked if this is ethical.

  6. Good old Statler & Waldorf would have a field day throwing insults and quips at the ongoing disaster this lot present!
    I do however seriously believe it is time to have a final curtain call on this sad tradgedy and apology for a public service.
    BTW I believe Toyota have just announced 1.5 day a week working in the UK with Honda and Nissan not far behind. The problem appears to be one of manufacturing back in the Japanese homeland. No widgets = no wingdings = no sales = WTF do we do now? Have a group hug, and follow that olde nautical saying "if in danger, if in doubt, shout and scream and run about"!
    It really is a SNAFU or CLUSTERFECK depending on your point of view.
    Next Knighthood please.

  7. There are people on death row who have a brighter outlook for the future than most HMRC employees.
    How is this man still in a job???
    What does it take to get these morons out....

  8. What is that noise coming over yonder hill? It appeareth to be growing and getting ever closer.
    Why, 'tis the sound of the truth about to be a cacophany.
    Best get some earplugs Excom & co. I think you already know the tide has turned.
    I bet your staff would hesitate to urinate on you if you were on fire, I would be tempted but would rather find a public urinal instead, and there's not many of them left these days.
    Gok Wan and Al Murray would do a better job on 3 days a week than this lot on full time.
    What's the difference between this lot and piles? You can cure piles but you can't cure this lot, apparently.

  9. The tone of the reply to a perfectly reasonable Hotseat question is shocking in the extreme and smacks of "I'm alright Jack". Quite clearly staff happiness is not one of Lamey's performance indicators.

    I recommend no member of staff should take this sorta shit from anyone. All the staff should go on six month's sick leave for stress caused by corporate bullying and let's see how quickly HMRC go into meltdown,

  10. Same HMRC as always, keep sweeping the problems under the carpet. I don't think they will ever learn, in my opinion 'managers' like Lamey and I do use the term loosely are simply not capable of listening, they are paid far too much for doing nothing and are an unworthy drain on public finance.
    If you point out an issue with systems or HMRC culture then you are branded negative for telling the truth or the age old lie that it would costs millions to correct the system.

  11. You all really need to look at the new plan for 2011/12.
    If you read between the lines ignoring the political speak you will begin to understand just how bad things are.
    And this is what they are having to publish.
    21:30 is correct about things under the carpet, the trouble is the underlay is now thicker than a new pillow but has more lumps!

  12. this is a back-door threat by a thug.

  13. Isnt this the guy that said "anyone submitting a grievance has lost the plot?"
    HMMMM plot losing Lamey rearrange into a well known phrase etc.

  14. So, what does it take to get something done about this lot?
    When you reach a stage like now, where nothing is a surprise, rather just evidence of continued and worsening maladministration in public office where is the answer?
    Perhaps it really is time for the Government to send in the IPCC and/or HMIC and some top forensic accountants, give them an open remit otherwise don't even bother. Why? There must be some almighty skeletons hiding in various cupboards going back as far as the Mapely debacle.
    Just make sure there are no serving or former HMRC anywhere near the paperwork in IPCC or HMIC!

  15. I suspect that the Treasury Select Committee have been sent a copy of this.

  16. Re lost the plot I was told that it was Stephen Banyard who said this to a group of senior managers.

    Lamey seems to be like one of those motorists who have never had an accident but seen loads in their rear view mirror. He causes calamity then disappears.

    This does hit a new low even for HMRC or Lamey. It is either breathtakingly arrogant or unbelivably stupid - Lamey is capable of both so it's hard to tell.

    As for the 08.47 comment I suspect you are right about skeletons in the cupboard. I think that Politicians have been allowed to get away with tax evasion, or at least not named and shamed, and therfore they do not want to rock the boat. I also believe high profile ex private sector recruits into HMRC have received similar favourable treatment.
    This will be a good test though because I believe Lamey's response, in the present climate is indefensible. He should go but I will not hold my breath.

  17. Nah, reckon there will be one or two token scalps with huge payoffs and an acceptance of problems.
    A trumpet fanfare and launch of pacesetter 2, the sequel! Be a bit like Predator vs Alien and just as 10,000 more staff to go.
    It would be more than political suicide for Cameron to have the guts to do anything let alone the Tax management specialist of a Chancellor and their banker, or should it be wanker colleagues tolerating a change to the status Quo.
    Buy shares in a certain mobile phone company, after its recent tax break its got some capital to invest probably as a tax write-off.

  18. Ken

    Next week, I am sure you can lead on Lamey's attempt to clarify. And the Dame's explanation on the intranet. Neither say categorically that low staff survey scores won't be taken as a sign of low productivity. In fact, she suggests it logically is. Join the dots.

    Anyway, the threat has been made. If a few people take fright and give senior management high marks, then Excom will be dancing in the streets.